BDTA Annual Christmas Dinner - 6th January 2007

This light-hearted review is for those of you who unfortunately were unable to attend, or were too drunk to remember it.

This year's Christmas meal was held at the Glass House Café - or as it was known on the night, the Glass House Castle. Although the Glass House is undergoing major renovation work, our hosts, Lynne and Keith Newton, went out of their way to make us feel more than welcome.

Twenty-four members were supposed to attend - 25 if you count the ghost. Unfortunately, Stan and Joy didn't make it - we hope everything is ok! In spite of this, the remaining 22 members had a fantastic evening, one that will surely go down in history! (Pardon the pun!)

Why 'pardon the pun'? Well, it was a medieval themed evening, set back in time well before even Chairman David was born - about 700 years ago.

Although none of the members wore medieval costumes, some had a good stab at it. Nice tie, Terry! As for Chris Marshall, she looked more evil than medieval. Only jesting, Chris! You looked stunning or was it stunned? Pete was there. 

The evening started at around 7:30. As we dismounted our carriages, we were greeted by wench Lynne, and offered a tot of 'wassail': a typical mulled alcoholic beverage made from apples and honey - Don rather liked this but said he would have prefered it in a pint glass.

The décor of the room reflected the medieval era, with wall-hung tapestries covering the 'Quik Snax' menu boards, and banners of red, gold and green delicately shrouded the hot plates. Light was provided by table candles and an authentic low-level gas blower kept one's feet rather warm.

The tables were arranged in an informal manner. This didn't stop Lord Chamberlain Alan Bolt picking on Scurvy Knave Bill, though!

Shortly after, the Lord Chamberlain whisked away David and Joyce, only for them to return as King and Queen dressed in regal-red robes and cardboard Burger King Crowns (as if he isn't powerful enough!)

Lord Chamberlain explained the powers of the King, including the need of us common-folk to seek permission to use the privy. Basically:

If you had need to leave somehow,

Women would curtsey and men would bow,

Even if you could not wait,

'Twas the King who'd decide your fate.

Lest you leave your cap to doff,

The King would have your head cut off.

(Or anything else for that matter!) And yes, it was in rhyme!

The problem was no one could remember the correct rhyme so as you can imagine there were alot of made up ones, some were even rather rude - we refer to Neil's version that ended with fiddle or something that rhymes with that, and John's rhyming cash!!

Anyhow it was all taken in good taste. Talking of which...

...The choice and quality of  food was very very good with plenty to fill your plate: especially the desserts which were enormous. There weren't many empty plates, apart from Ross'!

Between each course, and there were four, our friendly Chamberlain would entertain us with a few medival jibes and ditties. At one stage the Minstrel, Steve Redshaw, gave us a rendition of typical medieval ballads and music played on a lute and some other instrument that resembled a battered guitar from a Black Sabbath concert. That's one Phil will remember.  Perhaps someone can tell us what the instrument is called.

By  now it's nearly 11 o'clock and time to leave but before going David offered a vote of thanks to the staff, including: Ben Newton a serf to serve; Lynne and Keith Newton our hosts; Richard and Caroline the young chefs; Steve Redshaw, Minstrel; and the Lord Chamberlain, Alan 'The Blacksmith' Bolt   

Many thanks to everyone that turned up, especially Mary who played a major part in the arrangements. We must do this again sometime.